The Anand Karaj.

Years ago Shanti Kaur questioning the Siri Singh Sahib Harbhajan Singh about the practice of having the Palay (the shawl) wrapped over the Man's shoulder, and the woman holding it from behind as the man leads the woman. She thought this was some old non Sikh practice and was wondering why we do this. Especially from the aspect of why the woman had to be in the back and following the man (being subservient). There was a first answer which I don't remember...(Maybe Guruka singh can fill in) which she listened to but was not satisfied, so went back to him again. He said the second time....something like "You see the woman being dragged by the man and following him as a lesser than equal. Marriage is a carriage. I see the woman being the leader, holding the shawl like reigns of the horse, directing the Man from behind. It's all how you look at it."

Thanks to Gurmustuk for posting this!